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ladycop asks

am I really the one being selfish here? Or do i deserve some affection as well?!  

Marriage | Answered

So I am twenty and my boyfriend is 22 years old, we moved in together when i became pregnant last year and now we have a daughter of a few months.. a few years together we have always had our differences but its never been this worst. After i became pregnant, he no longer wanted to touch me nor did he demonstrate affection, only when he wanted to ask me for oral sex..

Now that i am no longer pregnant, I have noticed that things have worsened.. We dont have sex because I am still not ready for it i am still recuperating from giving birth.. BUT he would ask for oral sex, and then I would tell him sure but he would need to show me affection as well, you know just to get me in the mood.. & he will put the excuse that I should be wanting to do that because he is my man but I keep asking until he gives in but by then I am feeling bad because i shouldnt plead a man to please me. I love to get back rubs and so i try any way possible to get one from him, wether its through bets or whatever.. it happens to be that the past few times he has asked me for oral,, I have him promise me he will owe me a back rub.. and now it happens to be that he never wants to.. either he is too tired cus he works and i dont or he says he doesnt have time fo himself so how could i think he has time for that.. But see I dont have a job but i stay home & take care of the baby day and night BY MYSELF and do all the chores nessesary so thats a job there). & it gets me mad he says he doesnt have time for himself so he cnt give me a backrub but yet when there is a game or a fight, he takes out the time. Even to play a video game, go out and smoke with his friend or even just ask me for oral he obviously has time but not for me,.. & then when i complain to him that its not fair he gets what he wnats and i dont he says "what.. once a f***** week? please! you dont do nothing either! .. you should be doing that everyday". So its so unfair cus i do it more than once a week & not to mention even in times he dont ask i go ahead and do it.. but why treat

best answer by Traci1978...

He's being very selfish and acting like a child. A lot of people think that women who stay home and take care of children and the house have tons of free time and spend their days watching Oprah and soap operas.

Usually you can begin to have sex again after about 6 weeks as long as their are no complications. Talk to your doctor if there is a problem.

Your boyfriend sounds like he just wants to get his and could care less about what you and your daughter need. If you think it will help see a councilor together to help work out some of these issues. If he's not willing to go you will need to decide what is best for you and your daughter. Is living in a home with a man who treats you like this what you want your daughter to see? This is what she is going to learn about how a couple should interact.




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