"Money And Problems"

"So money and problems is right. I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and we are talking about taking it to the next level. In the next month we will be closing on a house and we already "share" money. My boyfriend is really smart and for whatever reason has had a tough time finding a job. In the mean time, I have supported him by buying him food, paying his rent, putting gas in his vehicle, and even making his car payment. That I can handle. What I cannot handle is his excessive spending on things that he does not need and the way that he justifies it to himself. He is in denial, he blows through all of our money, to a point that we don't have enough to cover bills and end up robbing Peter to pay Paul.

We recently started a business and were able to make a pretty penny off of it, however the money was gone as soon as we got it. We made specific plans on how we were going to spend the money (bills & savings) to ensure we had enough for a down pmt. Instead, he went to poker room and nickel and dimed the rest away. We have fought time and time again. I tell him we have $300 to last us till I get paid and he goes out and spends $700... leaving me nothing and depleting our savings. He cannot stick to a budget and Its incredibly frustrating seeing my savings and my hard earned money spent by someone else on stupid things. "We" never have any money, but he will spend, spend, spend anyways.

Every week it's something new, $900 here, $700 there and that's after all the bills are paid and food is bought. I know he is trying and it's hard to change your lifestyle, but I'm sick of hearing I'm sorry. We are talking thousands of dollars in just a couple of months. We should have more than enough in our account to get us by and not stress. Sorry isn't cutting it anymore, all my efforts are being shut down by someone else and I can't deal. I have threatened to take him off the account so he cannot have access and give him what he needs to survive. He feels this is me not respecting him and frankly I don't care. I say I would respect a man that can admit he has a problem and ask for help. Instead of saying youre sorry do things to prevent the same thing from happening in the future and show me. It seems as soon as one argument passes, he does it again and the next comes on.

He actually told me that he wasn't spending any money and that he had earned some and was going to deposit it in the bank. Come to find out, he had been using my credit card the whole time and spent over $250 dollars with out asking or telling me and he doesn't even think what he did was wrong. So, what is your advice on this one? How would you deal with someone how doesn't learn from their mistakes and justifies their spending, all at your expense?...view more"