Heartbroken.

It's true, we dated for four years and I loved him very much. The reason we dated for four years was because I saw potential with us but thought we had to learn to work out our problems before we could make the final commitment. I tried my best and did everything I could to improve on everything he asked of me, which was not much.

On his side though, we had many recurrent fights. He had a temper problem and would get incredibly angry about the smallest things, like whether I called him right when I woke up like I said I would or if I called half an hour past when I woke up. And when he got mad, there was no stopping it or reasoning with him - he would yell at me and drive me to tears and even when I was crying he would keep going.

I said over and over that if he loved me then he would have to work on his temper because it hurt me deeply, and he would always feel sorry afterwards and promise he would try, but nothing ever really changed. I warned him over and over that things would end if nothing changed and he always brushed it off and took me for granted. So after four years of innumerable bouts of crying and pain on my end, I cut things off and left.

No, I was not seeing anyone while I was seeing him. I did not cheat. I will admit that I moved on in a matter of weeks, but it was because I was vulnerable and also really wanted to get on with my life after being so upset at the failed effort of the past four years. I feel like he never really loved me, just liked to make a show out of it for his conscience's sake. When it came down to what really mattered, he couldn't even try to fix things for us. And now that I'm gone he still can't acknowledge his fault and finds it easier to point the finger at me than take any responsibility.

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