Is being a good family member defined by giving until no one else ask.

Family members for years has asked for loans, some repaid most not. Gr8 neice (21yrs, 22 in a few weeks) had fight with her mom resulting in police being called. Mom left town, left daughter on her own. Daughter moved in with boyfriend, after muffing boyfriend in the face and fighting with boyfriend she called and asked to live with me after being turned down by other family members. After letting her know that I no longer could afford to continue to give as in years past I said yes and agreed to her time limit of 2 weeks only. She stayed 8 weeks, partied every night; claimed she had a job that never materialized, offered no support around the house and shopped routinely. I tried to get her to get back in school; which she continuously lied about. Job she continuously lied about. She would routinely spend night out. On the final occassion when she was gone for 1 week I assumed she moved. I texted her and asked her to come and get her things from my house; only to find out that she expected to keep them there. Again we are far beyond all of the deadline dates she stated and she has not talked to me about any changes of plans (too busy partying). She has yet to say thank you for taking me in (yes I had a lot of additional expense). She is at my neices house (where she told me she didn't want to go) and I am now being confronted by my neice stating that I have that big old and and that it doesn't cost me anything to let her stay there. She is trying to convince me that I am not be a good family member.
By Libra4Life 9 years ago :: Family (Extended)
  • Carol Cohen
    MSW,ACSW,LMSW
    Licensed Psychotherapist, Author, Relationship Expert Seen on Oprah. With 25 years of experience, I provide caring, honest, non-judgmental help for your relationship issues. $3.49/minute
       4.91/5
  • Rafael Richman
    Ph.D.
    Are you feeling stuck, trapped in the same patterns that repeat over & over? Are you feeling angry, alone, unappreciated & unheard? I can help you. $2.85/minute
       4.84/5
  • View More Experts
    15