why block my sexuality?

As you guys know am married and i have a lil girl...
since elementary school i had been a town boy and i always liked guys..
when i got to high school my father change my clothes since i really look like a dude so now am ok girly i liked it and guys sure look at me alot maybe cuz i got a apple bottom or something like that they said..
i alway s though females where nice looking i had maybe 2-3 dreams of girls and me....
i had a female as a gf and it was nice i like it but when we get in you know what i cant get down....
i told this to my husband and he keeps avoiding the conv. he said that
is just a though and if i dont think about it or talk about it it will go away.....