What do I do about my boyfriends jealous and instigative behavior?

My boyfriend is perfect for me except for one thing..his non trusting issues. A long time ago he was in a 4 year relationship and on their anniversary he walked in on his gf having sex with another guy. I know this has scarred him and has left him with trust issues, but I would never do ANYTHING to hurt him. I am in love with this guy, but no matter what I say I know in the back of his head his mind is racing.

He questions me sometimes like if I've had any guys over at my house or what I did during the day. Then he makes comments about what I wear. Like my halloween costume he basically said that I needed to cover up. Honestly, my costume is not short at all. I even got my brothers opinion, my best friend and her boyfriends opinion. He says he doesn't want me to give guys a reason to stare at me. He doesn't want me talking to guys, flirting or touching at all. I don't know what to do. We always get into arguments about this same issue. It's not that I purposely want to flirt, but I do like having conversations with people including those of the opposite sex. I don't know what to do. I'm not a little girl and don't like being told what I can and can't do. And when he questions me, its just negative reinforcement.

We have been only dating for 3 months and I only fear that it will get worse. I really love him, care about him and want to be with him but what can i try to do to fix it or at least gradually get better? Couples counseling?? HELP ME PLEEASE!
By roxy123 9 years ago :: Dating
  • Iain A. Morrison
    MA Psych Cert Ed.
    Loving attachment is probably the greatest source of our happiness - I can help if it is going wrong - or manage the hurt if its over $2.00/minute
       4.82/5
  • Robert Betancourt
    MA, Professional Counseling,Therapist
    Emotional Healing-25+ years experience in helping people find solutions that work. "one of the best therapists here" $2.49/minute
       4.93/5
  • View More Experts
    11