Does everything in a marriage have to be even? Financially or otherwise?

several years ago I was a smoker. I gave up when I fell pregnant with my first child. Now I have 2 children & two step children. I have recently returned to the work force & am feeling VERY stressed trying to balance my responsibilities at work with where my heart really is - at home with my kids!
occoasonally, to combat the stress I will buy my self a packet of ciggies. After a few times I started to feel a bit guilty - not only for my health, but also for the $$$$ that we daont really have to spend. So as a deterent, to make me think seriously about "do I really need these" I came up with a plan that every time I bought a pack , I would transfer half the value into an account for my husband. He likes to dabble on ebay but we can rarely afford it. This way i was getting something I need & he was also getting something that he wants. He immediately got the cranks & demanded that he should receive the total value - not half.!! I was trying to be nice &feel that my niceness has got me into trouble as we cannot resolve this issue. Next time I have the inkling to be nice I should just shut up. Is half fair ? should he be happy with that? or does he deserve the whole amount.
By Dearne 9 years ago :: Marriage
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