Is my ultimatum, me or the platform bed, unreasonable? Should I wait it out and go with the flow or stand my g

"So I met my current boyfriend through eHarmony. Our first date was September 11 of this year. We live in neighboring states 2.5 hours apart. I am 33 years old. He is 6 months older than me. I own a townhouse and my Mother lives with me. She is a widow, I am an only child and she has stage IV cancer. I bought the townhouse for us after she caught her condo on fire boiling water. She fell asleep on the couch. She had to live in a hotel for two months and I finally gave in to her begging to live together.
Boyfriend bought a house in Florida in August of this year. In July he had a car accident. He's on disability because he has to see a chiropractor and a physical therapist 5 days a week. He's a tug boat captain and he works two weeks on and two weeks off. So he is out to sea for two weeks at a time. Says he can't be out to sea and visit his doctors at the same time. Meanwhile he is living at his parent's home 2.5 hours from me. He also has a 40 foot catamaran.
The first time I went to his parent's house they were at the house in Florida. I got a load of his bedroom and was ready to walk out but I wanted to see the boat. His story is that he lost his larger bedroom to one of his younger sisters after he moved away for college. When he came back he had to fit everything into a smaller room. He built a platform bed. Straight out of Different Strokes . It is above his dresser and desk. I will give him credit. It is a queen size matress but there is a ladder that you have to climb to get into bed.
Now his parent's are very religious and they do not approve of their son sleeping in the same bed as a woman he is not married to. I'm fine with that. What I am not alright with is this bed on a platform that my 33 year old self has to climb a ladder to get into. Also his comforter is made of recycled t-shirts from his high school wrestling days that his mother sewed or something.
Up until now I have been sleeping in his sister's room because she has been away at college. She was home for Thanksgiving break.
I had a fit over his bed on the platform and the t-shirt comforter. I was cold. I couldn't cuddle with him. He said he would fix it. I expect him to get a normal bed. One that doesn't require a ladder to get in and out of. I told him I won't be back until the platform bed is gone.
He has not fixed it. He simply says that his sister went back to school. I can sleep in her bed now. I've told him it is akward enough having to visit him at his parent's home. He has two parents. I have one. The only thing he is responsible for is his room. If he expects to have company he needs to provide a decent bed.
I don't think he is going to give on this.
Oh, I'm an interior designer/space planner so his excuse that everything won't fit in the room without the platform bed isn't working on me. He also says he plans to have a platform bed in one of the bedrooms at his new home in Florida. I asked him if it is the master bedroom. He said, no.
He is going to be on disability for at least another two months according to his physical therapist. He says the only reason he is at his parent's house is for therapy and me.
I told him to put the other stuff somewhere else. Their couch is not comfortable either. I'm ready to call it a deal breaker.
By moongirl 9 years ago :: Dating
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