Why doesn't she see where I'm coming from all of a sudden?

Basically my girlfriend Sarah and I have been together for just over 4 years now. I'm 24 she's 22.

When I came on the scene she was part of a group of 3 female friends. Even on the first date they were interfering in our relationship and it genuinely felt like there were 4 of us involved. After my best efforts to get to know the friends, Julia and Josie, I concluded that it was never going to happen.

A year into my relationship with Sarah, at a party at Sarah's house, Josie came out with an outrageous claim that I had been cheating on Sarah infront of a house full of people. When questioned she refused to give any further details of my apparent liasons.

After alot of talking between Sarah and myself I managed to convince her that Josie had indeed made the rumour up, a fact backed up by a number of mutual friends.

Our relationship has it's up and downs just like everyone elses, but there is an ongoing arguement we seem to be having day in day out. I'm quite a laid-back person, but the following arguement has been going on many years on and off. I will list a number of examples of where I'm coming from.

1. I asked Sarah numerous times about going away on holiday together, (even after 4 years it still hasnt happened) she completely avoided the subject for 3 weeks. Only to inform me that she had booked a last minute deal and was going away THAT night with her friend Julia.

2. Sarah will avoid talking about up and coming plans which she feels might annoy me and then informs me at the last minute that she has plans that day and we cannot do things I have asked her to do.

3. Any time Sarah goes out with friends I am never invited, even though every time I go out with my friends she is always there.

The underlying feeling is I'm deliberately being avoided at times, to suit her. I would not have a problem with Sarah spending time with friends without me but its also annoying to find out at the last minute that Sarah's had plans for weeks.

Anyway onto the more important side of the arguement, 4 years into our relationship, Josie, friend number 2 has been out of the equation. Got onto the wrong side of the rails and started taking drugs etc. I listened to Sarah go on about Josie day in day out for ages.

Last week Josie appeared at a friends birthday party, and ever since Sarah has been spending more and more time with her. For example Sarah was at a family party on the Saturday and came to visit me afterwards at my house, only to phone her sister and say "if Josie phones, I'm out with the cousins"

I just wish I could understand how someone can disappear off the radar for 3 years, then come back on the scene and after a week have your girlfriend lying about seeing you.

Any opinion would be great...
By Jimbobskyline 8 years ago :: Dating
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