Boyfriend of 4 years sneaking around online....Is this cheating?

"Ok, so today I was on my boyfriend's laptop trying to type in "Facebook" to the URL bar but the page didn't load fast enough and only got the "book" part... Which made me see my boyfriend had been on some site called "My Yearbook"... Which turns out to be social networking site. I was about to ignore it, but then I saw all this other stuff like "flirting" etc etc.

So I had a read of my boyfriend's profile (we've been together for 4 years) and I find stuff like this:

1-He didn't put his last name as his name, instead just put an "!" where it should have gone.
2-He didn't put that he was in a relationship
3-He said on a photo where a bit of my body was in in (when asked who it was) that it was of "his girlfriend at the time".
4-Part of this website means you can "buy" pictures and people. He had "bought" some whorish girl
5-95% of people on there were slutty girls
6-He had joined groups like "Cyber City" and "Vampire Crypt" (which looked like some sexual sadistic group) and "Seduction Lair"???
7-He was commenting on all sorts of photos like this half dressed "pin up" girl
8-We met online, and someone asked him on his wall if he had ever "fallen for someone online" and his answer was "I suppose.."
9-He has "Kinky, kinky, kinky" listed on his page as something of "10/10 importance"
10-His wall was full of questions, etc from slutty girls like "Who's the prettiest girl on your friends list" and "I wanna f*ck you!" and all his photo comments that he made were on girls half dressed and all the ones he received were girls saying "You're the hottest guy ever" and "I wanna jump you" etc etc.

When I confronted him about it, this is how he responded to all of these things:

1-He's a musician and he didn't want "fans of his music" to see the site. Cough
2-He said he didn't know that you could put that you're in a relationship...Well, everyone else who could operate a computer/the internet found it pretty easy to list that they were in a relationship?
3-He said he had "mis-worded the sentence".. seems to be making a lot of easy errors, huh?
4-He said it was because "he felt good/popular" if he had more "points" on the website
5-He said it was people that added HIM and people that were talking to HIM.... Uhh, dude, you're talking to them right back? He said he once (wow!) commented on a guy's photo, who was topless and had a guitar. I said, "Well, it was obviously you were commenting on the musical side of things. With those girls, what is it that is so awesome about them being half dressed?" His answer? "The light was good in the photo" Bullllllll.
6-He said he joins every group that he gets requests from.
7-Once again, apparently he is incapable of "wording" things properly.
8-Once again, "The light was nice!" ..."Oh, it had nice contrast!" Nice light and contrast over what, her huge fake tits?
9-Apparently there were boxes that you could check for interests and he "just checked all of them".. I said "Well if there were boxes that said you liked threesomes and cheating on your girlfriend would you have clicked yes??" From him: *LONG PAUSE*......"Yes?"
10-Apparently he liked the attention. #[email protected]%*.


Ugh, I just feel sick.

1) Is this considered cheating?
2) Are his points valid, and discount him from cheating?
2) What should I do about it?...
By queenjane 8 years ago :: Dating
  • Wendy Comen
    Psychologist-LPA
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