Am i over reacting? Is my husband punishing me for something or is it depression?

My husband and i have been married for 30yrs, we still love each other even though we have been through what seems like hells fire at times.we met age 16 now both just turned 50,we have always argued and i dont claim to be an angel but he treats me like a child. example of this would be words do i have to hold your hand, and when explaining something he would say what dont you not get. we had a planned day out and because i had asked him for help though ido have to admit he had helped a bit but i felt a bit agitated that day, while we were having words in the car he said that if i was going to go on winging he would rather i never whent. i said then turn the car around and take me back home and he did, i was very hurt as this is the frist time he has acted on a argument this way. he did say later during a row that he felt hurt by leaving me.i may add that he has recently lost a loved one and has taken to sleeping in the other bedroom. i am confused by his actions latley he says he loves me, i just dont feel it seems like i am to blame for everything. some times it feels like i am being punished for things. i am trying to make sense of it all, please help