Is my bof using me? What do I do about him seemlying sponging off me? Any advice is great!
Ok so my bof and I have been together for 4 years. I believe he loves me a lot and he has helped me get over a lot of really bad things in my past (that I have had done to me and that I have done).
The thing is I pretty much support him. He has no car, I make way better money than him (being that I went to uni and really work hard), he has a ten yo loan that is still not paid off (I had a 6 month car loan that I paid off). We both come from poor upbringings but I am very much a if you don't have it don't spend it girl where as he seems to just use me. I have confronted him so many times about it and we work out ways to deal.
What really gets me is when he thinks 'I owe him $'s hello you use my car! I pay most of the bills and I bought the furniture what!!!!'. We decided to work out a payment plan and take a holiday, turns out his work fell through (to which he was very upset as this in his eyes was his one chance to support me) and me being me has found a really good job and as default am supporting him. I mean btw his ten to loan repayments (the loan was just to party! YEAH I KNOW!) I am like be a man and deal with this! He is trying and I am trying to help him but I cannot stop treating him like the (excuse this word please B*&&!) I mean deal with it! It is 4 years! why am I still the bread winner / saver! without him financially I would be some much better! and he is so much better off with me (but I know he loves me a lot!) what do I do?
Do I make another big deal about it / ensure I keep tabs on what he borrows? What do I do? I mean if this where reversed what would you do! Sorry for the typos! I am really mad!
I am just sick of trying to be understanding I mean if you are with someone and they earn more than you should they contribute more than you? I don't know what to do! the secrete anger keeps me up most nights!
Thanks guys! I hope I do not sound like a crazy person!
The thing is I pretty much support him. He has no car, I make way better money than him (being that I went to uni and really work hard), he has a ten yo loan that is still not paid off (I had a 6 month car loan that I paid off). We both come from poor upbringings but I am very much a if you don't have it don't spend it girl where as he seems to just use me. I have confronted him so many times about it and we work out ways to deal.
What really gets me is when he thinks 'I owe him $'s hello you use my car! I pay most of the bills and I bought the furniture what!!!!'. We decided to work out a payment plan and take a holiday, turns out his work fell through (to which he was very upset as this in his eyes was his one chance to support me) and me being me has found a really good job and as default am supporting him. I mean btw his ten to loan repayments (the loan was just to party! YEAH I KNOW!) I am like be a man and deal with this! He is trying and I am trying to help him but I cannot stop treating him like the (excuse this word please B*&&!) I mean deal with it! It is 4 years! why am I still the bread winner / saver! without him financially I would be some much better! and he is so much better off with me (but I know he loves me a lot!) what do I do?
Do I make another big deal about it / ensure I keep tabs on what he borrows? What do I do? I mean if this where reversed what would you do! Sorry for the typos! I am really mad!
I am just sick of trying to be understanding I mean if you are with someone and they earn more than you should they contribute more than you? I don't know what to do! the secrete anger keeps me up most nights!
Thanks guys! I hope I do not sound like a crazy person!
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