Fantasizing or Not.....Looking for Real Love?

Been with him for 16 years. Caught twice in the last 5, cheating (emails, cell phone messages & Pictures). He doesn't call that cheating, I do. Nonetheless, it is what it is. Here's what I am asking....

I'm now at a point in my life, that I want Love, the real thing? Yes, I have forgiven him and life goes on, but now this is want I am seeking. I'm truly looking within and want this. Whether it's valid or not, I don't know. Do I have any idea how I will find it, no. Will I seek it out, no. I just feel like there is something out there that I haven't yet found. I'm rambling at this point, so I need to stop.

He's kind & a hardworker, however he drinks & smokes too much and very often I am alone watching tv at 8pm (he;s out). I just figured something out writing this....I'm also lonely.

Me, I'm 55 , hard worker, high work ethic, intelligtent with integrity. Good strong morals and I consider myself attractive and somewhat easy to love.

I'm considering starting a womens support group here in town "to just talk to other women" that could be a situation like mind. I do not want to seek out a counselor or a therapist. I want to hear real stories. Who knows, maybe I can help someone with mine.
By grandma04 15 years ago :: Marriage
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