is aking for more romance in our marriage too much?what am i doing wrong?

my wife and i have been married 10 yrs. together for 15 yrs. we have 3 great kidsages 14,12,and 8. we do lots together as a family . and every now and then theres a dispute between myself and my wife over sex. we both have full time jobs things can be hectic in house of 5, understandable. my hours at work allow me to be home very early in the day, i clean the house everyday, make the beds,plan dinner ,cook dinner,and help with dishes.i have been telling my wife that i need more romance in our love making over and over, to the point where she dont want to hear it nomore. its not that i want her to be a freak i ask for sexy shoes,candles burning, some body lotion etc. this friday that past each one of our children slept over one of there friends house, hey what do you know honeymoon for the night right? wrong! i got myself all done up, shaved,showered and even put on my silk pjs. what came next was me waking up alone. and her on the couch. let me point out that when i want any for the night i im the one burning candles waiting for her . and to no avail she dont wake me and goes to bed. i feel i do so much in the house getting the house tidy just so we can have time for love and nothing.she even made get a dvr for her shows .