my wife is cheating and we have 2 small children

I have asked this question once, but I am after additional responces please.

wife of 10 years has been cheating with a guy 15 years her senior (she is 38) we have 2 wonderful boys 4 and 2. In the last 12 months she has gone away with him on several trips both overseas and interstate totaling 2 months away, she comes home after 12am at least 2 times per week and uses me as a babysitter for the kids, so she can co off and live a palatial lifestyle and have the comfort of her home environment (when it suits her) counselling - she walked out; due to what she has done it has been very easy to emotionally detach myself from her. She has no remorse and goes along each day as if nothing is wrong, every time I speak to her about it, she builds up an angry wall of defence and i cant communicate to her. She has health issues which I am not sure if her hormones are being affected at all, its like she has no morals.
The kids are with me all the time, I organise them in the mornings and take them to day care/school and pick them up, and I do at least 70% duties, I do pull back just so she can spend time with them.
Before you all say, throw her out or get a lawyer!, I have spoken to a lawyer and in Australia; what she has done does not constitute her being a bad mother, as the judge would say "we have different parenting styles" and i would have to share custody.
I have been very accomodating and have had on my parenting 'hat' since there birth, I have not missed a day or night of there lives and as I said she has been away for more than 2 months (not counting 2 X per week returning home after 12am) so if we shared custody, to me it would feel like she is getting exactly what she wants and I am being punished by not seeying my boys and caring for them every day.
I have mentioned to her that I want the boys during the weekdays so I can be sure they get a stable schooling environment and she can have them on the weekends, she denied and said she wants them 50% - again, why should I give them up 50% ?
By willy71 16 years ago :: Parent/Child
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