What would you do in this situation? (Feels like a Soap Opera)

My friend recently found himself in the middle of what I call a soap opera situation.

My friend's (we'll call him Bob) ex-girlfriend and mother of his child took him to court to get an increase in child support. The child in question is almost 2 years old and spends most of her time under Bob's supervision.

Bob decided to contact a lawyer since this request was out of the blue and his funds were already being stretched to the limit.

Lawyer says "First of all, get a paternity test since you've never had one done."

The paternity test comes back and Bob isn't the father! The babies mother has been lying to him about being the father from the day she told him she was pregnant.

So now what? He's listed as the father on the birth certificate and has been raising the child for 2 years just to find out he's been wasting his time and money on someone else's child!

Does he cut off contact with the mother and baby since he's not the father? Does he sue the mother for all the money he's spent on the baby? Does he attempt to get full custody? Does he just walk away?

I don't know what parental rights you have being on the birth certificate but I think technically she could leave with the child tomorrow and he'd have no say. At the same time he doesn't want to walk away because he's the only father the poor baby girl knows.

I'm usually full of advice (some good, some bad, but always honest) but the only thing I could come up with was "Go back to the lawyer and see what he says." I feel horrible for Bob because he dropped out of college and took on a menial job (he's really quite brilliant) that allowed him to take care of what he thought was his child. His life has been a giant lie for about 2 years. What do you tell your friend?
By LegalizeMe 14 years ago :: Parent/Child
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