What should I do now?
Well, a lot of stuff has happened since the last question I asked, and I really need some advice. I've been dating the same girl for a year and a half now, and there have been some major ups and downs. From January to September of last year, she lived 15 minutes from me. After this she went to a boarding school about 12 hours away, so I didn't get to see her often at all. Only on her breaks. She got four a year, about two weeks each, before summer vacation, and we would see each other then.
Well, we stayed together all through the school year, and she came back in June. Over her spring break, we started getting into trouble with each other. I started sneaking out to see her, and the night before she went back to school, we slept together for the first time. I know it wasn't the smartest thing I've done, but what's in the past can't be changed, and I'm not going to be upset by something I can't fix.
Well, we've had a lot of ups and downs, issues we've had with fits of jealousy on either side, but we managed to make it through the long school year and now she's back home for the summer. This is where the new problems start to form.
She's always had feelings for an ex boyfriend of hers. At one point last summer, she ended up going to his house (I knew about this, and had no problems with her going) and they ended up curling up with each other on his bed, which she didn't tell me about until months later. I was hurt, but I let it go. Anyway, last week she told me she was going to go to the beach with him. This kind of hurt, because she knows how I feel about this, but I'm not the type of person to tell someone I'm in a relationship with that they can't do something, so I said that it made me really uncomfortable, but that if she wanted to go that I hoped she had a good time. Well, the day before she went to the beach, things got hectic.
I had a rough day at work (I'm a lifeguard) and didn't get to leave until a few hours after my shift ended. We were supposed to go to the movies, but plans got screwed up because of my work. Well, she ended up hanging out with her best friend instead and I went home to take a nap. I had forgotten about her going to the beach tomorrow and when I got on facebook later that night and looked, I saw that she still had plans to go to the beach. This absolutely infuriated me, and I know I shouldn't have been angry, but it made me extremely beyond jealous and upset. We fought that night about how close the two of them were and my trust issues and things like this. I forgot to mention that while she was at school, she got close to a total of three different guys over the year, getting feelings for all three of them at different points in time, which is what caused a lot of my trust issues.
Well, they went to the beach the next day, and when she got back she told me that nothing had happened. We fought more about how hard it is for me to trust her and different things like this, and after the fight finished up and we both cooled down, she broke up with me because she couldn't deal with the fighting anymore. I admit we do fight a lot, mostly about jealousy, but I really thought it was going to slow down. Right before school ended, I had tried to break up with her (over jealousy issues, surprise..), but took her back immediately the day after I did because we both wanted to be together over the summer. Now she's broken up with me and I don't know what to do. I waited all year and she just threw the summer away like that... We're still talking to each other (this break up happened late last night) just like we always have, and we're going to see each other tomorrow. She'll probably be coming over to my house and then we'll be going to a movie. We're still treating each other the exact same way, and I'm wondering if this is the right thing to do... How should I act tomorrow? We talked tonight and she asked me if I was still okay with sleeping with her. I told her I don't know. I still have the same feelings for her, and she says she feels the same for me, but it doesn't feel right to do that outside of a relationship. I'm confused and hurt and not sure what she's really thinking. Can someone help me sort all this out? We're 15 (me) and 17 (her). Any ideas on how I should handle not only tomorrow but the rest of the summer would be greatly appreciated.
As an afterthought, I was also wondering how long you think a break period should be after a relationship like this. A few weeks? Months? I've never dated somebody this long and I want to know how I should handle this. Advice on what to do would be great. Sorry for the long read guys, I hope you can help me out...
Well, we stayed together all through the school year, and she came back in June. Over her spring break, we started getting into trouble with each other. I started sneaking out to see her, and the night before she went back to school, we slept together for the first time. I know it wasn't the smartest thing I've done, but what's in the past can't be changed, and I'm not going to be upset by something I can't fix.
Well, we've had a lot of ups and downs, issues we've had with fits of jealousy on either side, but we managed to make it through the long school year and now she's back home for the summer. This is where the new problems start to form.
She's always had feelings for an ex boyfriend of hers. At one point last summer, she ended up going to his house (I knew about this, and had no problems with her going) and they ended up curling up with each other on his bed, which she didn't tell me about until months later. I was hurt, but I let it go. Anyway, last week she told me she was going to go to the beach with him. This kind of hurt, because she knows how I feel about this, but I'm not the type of person to tell someone I'm in a relationship with that they can't do something, so I said that it made me really uncomfortable, but that if she wanted to go that I hoped she had a good time. Well, the day before she went to the beach, things got hectic.
I had a rough day at work (I'm a lifeguard) and didn't get to leave until a few hours after my shift ended. We were supposed to go to the movies, but plans got screwed up because of my work. Well, she ended up hanging out with her best friend instead and I went home to take a nap. I had forgotten about her going to the beach tomorrow and when I got on facebook later that night and looked, I saw that she still had plans to go to the beach. This absolutely infuriated me, and I know I shouldn't have been angry, but it made me extremely beyond jealous and upset. We fought that night about how close the two of them were and my trust issues and things like this. I forgot to mention that while she was at school, she got close to a total of three different guys over the year, getting feelings for all three of them at different points in time, which is what caused a lot of my trust issues.
Well, they went to the beach the next day, and when she got back she told me that nothing had happened. We fought more about how hard it is for me to trust her and different things like this, and after the fight finished up and we both cooled down, she broke up with me because she couldn't deal with the fighting anymore. I admit we do fight a lot, mostly about jealousy, but I really thought it was going to slow down. Right before school ended, I had tried to break up with her (over jealousy issues, surprise..), but took her back immediately the day after I did because we both wanted to be together over the summer. Now she's broken up with me and I don't know what to do. I waited all year and she just threw the summer away like that... We're still talking to each other (this break up happened late last night) just like we always have, and we're going to see each other tomorrow. She'll probably be coming over to my house and then we'll be going to a movie. We're still treating each other the exact same way, and I'm wondering if this is the right thing to do... How should I act tomorrow? We talked tonight and she asked me if I was still okay with sleeping with her. I told her I don't know. I still have the same feelings for her, and she says she feels the same for me, but it doesn't feel right to do that outside of a relationship. I'm confused and hurt and not sure what she's really thinking. Can someone help me sort all this out? We're 15 (me) and 17 (her). Any ideas on how I should handle not only tomorrow but the rest of the summer would be greatly appreciated.
As an afterthought, I was also wondering how long you think a break period should be after a relationship like this. A few weeks? Months? I've never dated somebody this long and I want to know how I should handle this. Advice on what to do would be great. Sorry for the long read guys, I hope you can help me out...
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