Boyfriend's Weight Comments... at the gym.

My boyfriend and I get along great for the most part. He is really into health and fitness, so he works out at the gym a lot or tries too. For the first 7 months we dated, I worked out at the gym at my apartment. I recently moved to a place closer to him, and knowing that fitness is important to him (he told me so) I joined his gym and we went in together. He was lifting weights in the weight area like he usually does, and I spent 20 minutes doing cardio. I went to him in the weight room and asked where he was at. He said he needed more time and to go back to cardio. I went back to cardio, and he came over to me 10 minutes later saying he was nearly done. I told him I wanted to go work on my arm muscles, which was an idea he didn't like. We got to talking about Serena Williams and how I thought she looked great. He disagreed and said she looked mannish and ugly (even though she is a phenomenol athlete). He got upset about my opinion of her and how I wanted to be fit like her. He said, "You need cardio so you are acceptable in a bikini." I was floored. I am not overweight by any means. I am on the higher end of the BMI scale for the healthy range, but I am 5'7" and I wear size 8 jeans. I tend to wear shorts over bikini bottoms because I have wide hips. My hips are in fact wider than my shoulders - I am very pear shaped. My upper half is small and I wanted to work on my arms to build muscle and make my body more proportional. If I lost weight, I'd still look unproportional, only a lot smaller. I can't spot reduce. Anyways, what he said really hurt and I went to the locker room and cried in a bathroom stall. He found me later and apologized profusely, but I can't get over it. I am still depressed about it. I joined the gym so we could exercise together and the first day he told me in front of everyone there in a loud voice I needed to lose weight to 'look acceptable in a bikini'. How do I get over this? I know I am supposed to forgive and forget, but this has always been an issue for me. I have a tiny waist and disproportionate hips to my upper half (25 inch waist, 38 inch hips). I explained I have a history of other people calling me fat in my past because of this to him when he was apologizing. He has hinted at me losing weight before. Will this be the end of it, or will he keep suggesting or making worse comments in the future? We are both in our mid-twenties if that helps.
By Grassded 14 years ago :: Dating
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