Was my ex-girlfriend just using me to be in a relationship with someone?
Ok so I feel like the first and only girl I dated was never really into me, she just wanted to have a boyfriend. We got together from a friend who introduced us to each other, and most of our conversations were via text. We got along really well over text and eventually started going out, but in person it seemed like I wasn't worth much to her. Reasons I feel she used me:
1. She always talked to all of her friends and had good conversations with them, but never seemed to care to talk to me. Never attempted to have a conversation with me. Even when i tried to talk to her she would just give me one-worded answers, and we would never really get into a "conversation". It didn't help the fact that I was always really shy.
2. Sometimes didn't really acknowledge my presence, or made me feel like I was no-one. example: me and her and one of her friends are chilling out someplace near school. The friend has to leave, and even though I'm still there with her she goes "aw, don't leave me alone."
3. Never cared that much for intimacy between us. ex: Some days I'd bend over to give her a kiss when she had to leave and she would just be like "no" and kept walking. Then I'd be like "why?" and she'd be like "I don't feel like it." but she wasn't like mad or anything, she just says this in a smiling way. One time I held my arms out to hug her and she pretty much did the same thing.
4. Kind of in relation to one above, she had this best friend of hers, who was a gay guy, and when she'd see him she'd run towards him and like give him this big hug, and then constantly keep hugging him and showing him affection, like about 100x the affection that she would ever show me.
5. Didn't want to take a picture of me, or us together. There were at least two occasions where she would go around taking everyone's picture, but never wanted a picture of me, and on a similar occasion, took pictures of other couples but never wanted one of us.
6. Pretty much straight-up said things right in front of me that made me feel like I was hardly worth anything. "I don't have a prom date. Oh yeah, besides him (me)" In fact, it was a similar statement which drove me off the edge and led me to break up with her.
7. People who had noticed the way she was acting were starting to say that she never really liked me.
8. I began to feel like I was just manipulated and used like a worthless object, and like a worthless object is how she treated me.
I ended this relationship over 6 months ago, but honestly it still hurts. Even though we're friends now, after the break up, it still hurts that she had pretty much used me. What's weird is that after the break up, she told me that she truly did love me, but really after all of this how can I believe that she loved me? It's clear to me that she used me, or at least, that's how I feel. Has anyone else experienced a relationship where they were used like this?
Update: I think the worst part of the relationship was seeing how well she connected with her best friend, and seeing how much better they got along in person than she did with me. It just made me feel so worthless. Now that I recall there was one time where while she was holding him in her arms, and she asked him to make out with her (like not in a 100% serious way obviously because he was gay, but it still shows her feelings for him).
1. She always talked to all of her friends and had good conversations with them, but never seemed to care to talk to me. Never attempted to have a conversation with me. Even when i tried to talk to her she would just give me one-worded answers, and we would never really get into a "conversation". It didn't help the fact that I was always really shy.
2. Sometimes didn't really acknowledge my presence, or made me feel like I was no-one. example: me and her and one of her friends are chilling out someplace near school. The friend has to leave, and even though I'm still there with her she goes "aw, don't leave me alone."
3. Never cared that much for intimacy between us. ex: Some days I'd bend over to give her a kiss when she had to leave and she would just be like "no" and kept walking. Then I'd be like "why?" and she'd be like "I don't feel like it." but she wasn't like mad or anything, she just says this in a smiling way. One time I held my arms out to hug her and she pretty much did the same thing.
4. Kind of in relation to one above, she had this best friend of hers, who was a gay guy, and when she'd see him she'd run towards him and like give him this big hug, and then constantly keep hugging him and showing him affection, like about 100x the affection that she would ever show me.
5. Didn't want to take a picture of me, or us together. There were at least two occasions where she would go around taking everyone's picture, but never wanted a picture of me, and on a similar occasion, took pictures of other couples but never wanted one of us.
6. Pretty much straight-up said things right in front of me that made me feel like I was hardly worth anything. "I don't have a prom date. Oh yeah, besides him (me)" In fact, it was a similar statement which drove me off the edge and led me to break up with her.
7. People who had noticed the way she was acting were starting to say that she never really liked me.
8. I began to feel like I was just manipulated and used like a worthless object, and like a worthless object is how she treated me.
I ended this relationship over 6 months ago, but honestly it still hurts. Even though we're friends now, after the break up, it still hurts that she had pretty much used me. What's weird is that after the break up, she told me that she truly did love me, but really after all of this how can I believe that she loved me? It's clear to me that she used me, or at least, that's how I feel. Has anyone else experienced a relationship where they were used like this?
Update: I think the worst part of the relationship was seeing how well she connected with her best friend, and seeing how much better they got along in person than she did with me. It just made me feel so worthless. Now that I recall there was one time where while she was holding him in her arms, and she asked him to make out with her (like not in a 100% serious way obviously because he was gay, but it still shows her feelings for him).
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