Did I do something wrong?
Three months ago, back in May, my boyfriend, who I've been with since December, and I scheduled tandem skydiving for yesterday. I've reminded him about once a week since then, about the time and place, and about a week before hand reminded him every day.
We'd planned the entire time for him to spend the night prior--Friday night--at my place, because I'm much closer to the skydiving place. He's about 45-60 minutes northwest of me, and I'm ~35 minutes west of the skydiving place.
Friday morning, I was leaving his place for a hair appointment (I work nights, but had that night off) and confirmed with him that he was coming over to my place that night. He said yes, he'd come over when he was done working, and kissed me goodbye.
Friday afternoon around 5:00 he called me and I was excited, thinking he was on the way over. But he was playing golf with his friend. I tried to be "cool" about it, and told him I hoped he had fun. He said he'd be done soon and give me a call when he was finished playing, then he'd head over to my place. He said to go ahead and eat without him, because he'd be done after dark. I smiled and said okay.
At about 8:30 I called him and he said that he was at his friend's house eating real quick. He said he'd drank a lot and that he was pretty tired, but might wake up after a shower. He'd call me in "about an hour" to let me know.
My roommate and friends invited me out to the club as it was Friday night, but I declined because my boyfriend was coming over.
At 10:30 I gave up on him calling and called him. He was slurring and said he'd call right back. At 11:00 I tried calling him back and he didn't answer.
At 11am the next morning, I tried calling him (skydiving was scheduled for 2pm, so I was hoping he was already on the way to my place). He answered the phone groggily and said immediately to call him in 40 mins, he was really tired and needed more sleep.
At 11:40 I called him and said to hurry up, I wanted to leave my place by 1:00. He said okay.
At 1:15 I hadn't heard from him and called him. He said he was 15-20 minutes away from my place. I said I was leaving and he could meet me there. He got upset and said he really didn't think that was necessary.
I said I thought it was, so at least one of us could be on time. He said "okay cool, well in that case I'm gonna get something to eat."
There was a storm moving in we could both clearly see.
At 1:50 I showed up and they told me to hurry and get suited, that there was a storm moving in and they wanted to get me, my boyfriend and the 3:00-slotted people in before the storm.
I kept stalling for time, but their schedule didn't allow for a whole lot of cushion. At 2:15, he hadn't called or texted or anything in over 30 minutes despite my pleas to hurry. They basically said to me "this weather isn't going to hold. He's late. You can either go right now without him, and we can hopefully get him on a flight later, but if you don't got now, chances are you're going to have to reschedule." So I hopped on the plane and skydived and it was a lot of fun.
When I landed he was there and he immediately let me know that he was pissed at me, and said that the "whole point" was going together on the same plane and asked if I had any idea how f---ed up it was that I went without him. I told him what they'd said about the weather and he kept cutting me off with "whatever" every time I started to say something. I basically raised my eyebrows and just said "okay. yep." to everything he said from then on. They then confirmed that he couldn't go because of the storm moving in.
Then after 10 mins of trying to get a reaction out of me and failing, he said "well, I'm out." And he left, instead of coming to my place like we'd originally planned. And hasn't talked to me since. It's been since yesterday afternoon.
Did I really do something all that wrong? If I'd waited on him, neither of us would have been able to go. Because I feel like he knew when and where this was for 3 months. I shouldn't have to give up my slot because he can't be on time. The world--myself included--doesn't owe him something because he chose to drink too much.
By the way, I'm the one that paid for and scheduled it for both of us.
We'd planned the entire time for him to spend the night prior--Friday night--at my place, because I'm much closer to the skydiving place. He's about 45-60 minutes northwest of me, and I'm ~35 minutes west of the skydiving place.
Friday morning, I was leaving his place for a hair appointment (I work nights, but had that night off) and confirmed with him that he was coming over to my place that night. He said yes, he'd come over when he was done working, and kissed me goodbye.
Friday afternoon around 5:00 he called me and I was excited, thinking he was on the way over. But he was playing golf with his friend. I tried to be "cool" about it, and told him I hoped he had fun. He said he'd be done soon and give me a call when he was finished playing, then he'd head over to my place. He said to go ahead and eat without him, because he'd be done after dark. I smiled and said okay.
At about 8:30 I called him and he said that he was at his friend's house eating real quick. He said he'd drank a lot and that he was pretty tired, but might wake up after a shower. He'd call me in "about an hour" to let me know.
My roommate and friends invited me out to the club as it was Friday night, but I declined because my boyfriend was coming over.
At 10:30 I gave up on him calling and called him. He was slurring and said he'd call right back. At 11:00 I tried calling him back and he didn't answer.
At 11am the next morning, I tried calling him (skydiving was scheduled for 2pm, so I was hoping he was already on the way to my place). He answered the phone groggily and said immediately to call him in 40 mins, he was really tired and needed more sleep.
At 11:40 I called him and said to hurry up, I wanted to leave my place by 1:00. He said okay.
At 1:15 I hadn't heard from him and called him. He said he was 15-20 minutes away from my place. I said I was leaving and he could meet me there. He got upset and said he really didn't think that was necessary.
I said I thought it was, so at least one of us could be on time. He said "okay cool, well in that case I'm gonna get something to eat."
There was a storm moving in we could both clearly see.
At 1:50 I showed up and they told me to hurry and get suited, that there was a storm moving in and they wanted to get me, my boyfriend and the 3:00-slotted people in before the storm.
I kept stalling for time, but their schedule didn't allow for a whole lot of cushion. At 2:15, he hadn't called or texted or anything in over 30 minutes despite my pleas to hurry. They basically said to me "this weather isn't going to hold. He's late. You can either go right now without him, and we can hopefully get him on a flight later, but if you don't got now, chances are you're going to have to reschedule." So I hopped on the plane and skydived and it was a lot of fun.
When I landed he was there and he immediately let me know that he was pissed at me, and said that the "whole point" was going together on the same plane and asked if I had any idea how f---ed up it was that I went without him. I told him what they'd said about the weather and he kept cutting me off with "whatever" every time I started to say something. I basically raised my eyebrows and just said "okay. yep." to everything he said from then on. They then confirmed that he couldn't go because of the storm moving in.
Then after 10 mins of trying to get a reaction out of me and failing, he said "well, I'm out." And he left, instead of coming to my place like we'd originally planned. And hasn't talked to me since. It's been since yesterday afternoon.
Did I really do something all that wrong? If I'd waited on him, neither of us would have been able to go. Because I feel like he knew when and where this was for 3 months. I shouldn't have to give up my slot because he can't be on time. The world--myself included--doesn't owe him something because he chose to drink too much.
By the way, I'm the one that paid for and scheduled it for both of us.
0