when should your boy friend give you equal or close to equal importance as his 9 year old son ?

I am a single mother myself so I know that your kids must always take priority, but I am finding that
the man I have been seeing for 9 months is obsessed with his son.
I invited him and his son to come to the circus with me and my children.
He declined because of the cost and the because he is saving for a holiday in 2 months.
I accepted this at face value. Ticket were over $100 each…so I understood it was not a priority.
Due to circumstances I ended up with a spare ticket. Since it was his birthday I gave the spare
ticket to him as gift. He refused the ticket, as he said it would not be fair for him to go and not his son. He would feel ' guilty' having a good time while his son was missing out.
Is it right to refuse a gift? He voluntarily picks up his son every Friday night and spends the weekend
with him. We catch up on the Sunday night after his son has left. If there is an issue with the ex and for what ever reason she needs a baby sitter, he jumps at the opportunity and volunteers so he can be with his son even if he has made prior plans with me. This has happened on several occasions. We had plans for Wednesday night and his ex told him she was taking their son to the doctors the following night for a cyst, he immediately told her he would go with her and cancelled with me. Is this fair. He knew and I knew it was not life threatening, but he made me feel guilty and like a bad mother for questioning if he really needed to be there.
He has introduced me as his 'friend' to his son because he doesn't believe his son is ready to know that his dad has moved on. I am so confused. He is a very nice man and want to continue seeing him, but I am starting to have doubts about whether he is reedy to in a relationship. He has been separated - living apart from his ex for 3 1/2 years.
By janette 15 years ago :: Parent/Child
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