What Should I do? Or moreover, How Should I Feel?

So I started talking to a girl I met at work in September of 2012. In about January or February of 2013, thinks escalated to fooling around (i.e lots of kissing - but no sex) - we'd grab drinks, have lunch together, and have an occassional dinner. After learning that she wanted nothing serious and only wanted to fool around, I called things to an end, to avoid the risk of falling in love with someone at the office and not have the same feelings reciprocated.

She convinced me to continue with her plan, and I ultimately gave in, and ended up having sex. Things went back to normal, and shortly thereafter, she mentioned that she still didn't want anything serious. At which point, I broke things off, yet again. As luck would have it, she pursuaded me to stay with her...again. So I did.

During this time, she treated my like a 2nd class citizen, in other words, I always played 2nd fiddle to everyone and everything. In the process, we booked a trip to the carribean. We had an amazing time!!!!! But upon our return, things went back to normal, being 2nd to everything. So this time I broke things off for good! And to do so, I totally had to ignore her to avoid her advances and pursuasive ways.

One month later, we ended up talking and we ended up together again! She claimed to have had no idea why I broke things off. I told her because she was treating me like manure. She apologized and promised it wouldn't happen again. She did her best to show me that she was interested from there on in.

Things went really well for about a month, then I noticed, that if Id call her at night, she would almost get annoyed. If I asked her to hang out, laundry would sometimes take preference.

And on a day that a male friend of mine opened up a page on a dating site, I checked to see if she was on it, and low and behold, she was!!! And had been logging on!!! I called her on it, and she claimed that she would receive emails from the site, and that when she'd click on the link, it would take her directly into the site. What made things worse, was that she used pictures from OUR vacation to the Carribean!! Pictures I took!!!

I still forgave her and believed her excuse that she had posted those pics while we were broken up.

Next, I caught the password for her phone and checked it when she was in the shower at my home. I noticed a facebook message to a guy aquaintance (male friend of a friend), telling him, "that she was topless on the beach in the carribean with me", to which he responded by asking for a pic. Though it was in May, and we're currently in October, it still bothered me!! It was hurtful to know that while I was with her, she was seemingly flirting with another boy.

Having the gut feeling that there may have been more to find, I checked her phone again, but this time I got caught!!! She was so furious with me, that she broke up with me.

While I miss her deeply because she was so affectionate with me, I wonder whether I should let her go, or fight for her as I may have been jumping to conclusions.

Please help as I am emotionally confused and am uncertain as to how to proceed moving forward. Would appreciate any helpful advice!

By Hombre 11 years ago :: Dating
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