To all who gave advice, consider this...

I like to be objective, fair and reasonable and I apreciate all your advice and sides on my situtation with cheater boyfriend and nice soon to be ex husband.

Consider this. My boyfriend has tolerated me working with my ex everyday since day 1. He has never given me grief, acted jealous or made it an issue b/c he understands i love my career and have to stay put for a lot of reasons. Also, I have broken up with bf too many times to count for various reasons...1/2 are legit 1/2 are very insignificant and mostly due to my state of confusion and stress of my pending divorce. I have been a total B--- to him at times b/c I knew I could. Each time I've broken up with him, he has written long sappy love letters, for the 1st 2 years he sent flowers (he got tired of it and stopped) and to this day has bought me fine jewelry mostly with hearts on it b/c he says I am in his heart every minute of everyday(diamond rolex, tiffany necklaces etc)...Ive watched him cry begging me to please be with him always and forever...he is totally convinced that our connection is a gift and unique and our chemistry is a once in a lifetime thing...I have a very poor family and he has said he knows we will end up taking care of my mother and he is perfectly happy to do so...he wants to grow old with me he say...our friends all know how affectionate we are together...and when we go to dinner we can talk for 4 hours or when we are on vacation we just totally groove day in day out for a week or more. We love to work out together, we bike and are trainging for a triathalon right now. Its real what we have, its not fantasy. Its sucks that my trust is almost destroyed.

His cheating has happened during times I have left him, he has also lied a number of times when we were good too...no excuse...he says he knows its wrong...and entered into therapy on his own free will.

I am not trying to excuse him, I just want to explain the circumstances in greater detail as to paint the picture for what it really is...both sides of our story! I do not know what to do so dont think I am trying to get a reaction one way or the other, I want an objective point of view.

I have cheated before (not since high school), so I do not believe "once a cheater always a cheater"...I also believe people grow up or circumstances prevail.

I care for bf a lot and I can envision a sweet life together, but I am mortified to end up with a baby and a cheating husband...my fears run deep into my childhood and cheating father too. Its a lot of my own stuff as well as this current stuff!
By gulfcoast 16 years ago :: Dating
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