I am not very attractive, I'm married and my husband is always gone. Should we divorce?

I have really poor self esteem. I had two kids and I have trouble handling work,kids, cleaning the house, keeping my shape, cooking, cleaning. When we first married I had a great job that paid a decent salary. Because he and I had so many problems I left that job and stayed home for 4 years with our newborn and toddler. I thought that once the kids were older I would have more energy to do all that my husband required. He wants too much. He wants lots of sex. He visits lots of friends and family. He is very close to his brother and mother and visits them every other day. I am a Christian and he is not. He uses dope and drinks. I am miserable in this marriage. I've been married to him for 9 years. We've never had money for anything. No celebrations, No birthdays nothing. I want out but because of my religion I cant file for divorce. I am so much happier when he is not here. But the kids (our son and daughter) are miserable. I am sick and really tired of being miserable. I want happiness in this life. Also can't move yet as I have no savings. I want to leave can someone help me map out a plan to leave this jerk before I really screw my kids up from seeing this dysfunction.
By Mhoon 15 years ago :: Marriage
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