Base Models Aren't Enough For My Non-Working Wife

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Side 2
Side 1 says...

We have two cars and I usually drive the older one because I have a 30 minute commute in rush hour to work adding a fair amount of miles to it every year. My wife putters around town and occasionally has to take the kids to their activities but for the most part it's her just going to lunch with friends. Last week her car's transmission went out and rather than repairing the better deal was to trade it in for a newer car.

Now keep in mind I am paying. She's a stay at home mom and hasn't worked a real job for over 10 years. So in looking for a car she wants a 4Runner.

I told her we'd have to budget if she wanted a new one. Here's what I was looking at:

Basically almost the base model at $40K for someone who doesn't do anything seems pretty reasonable I feel. She said she would build her own for what she wanted. I said sure.

She comes back to me with this:

Almost $13,000 in upgrades! And making excuses about things like the running board isn't for her it's for the kids. Remote engine start in case it's raining...

I said no to it all and she was furious. She said she needed it. I said for what. She said she just did. This went back and forth a while until she finally broke down that her friend was getting something similar and she didn't want to seem like we were cheap.

I was blown away. It was never about the kids or anything with any worthy reasoning. This unemployed woman wants it for her ego alone.

I'm now considering just fixing the old car's transmission (which, btw, is a 2014 Chevy Traverse) just because she's acting this way. I'm the one who works and is buying it with the money I work for FOR HER and I have to drive the older car. It's almost amazing I'd ever have to deal with someone so worried about what someone else has. She just doesn't see it and she's crazy for it.

Added by practicalfather (male)
Side 2 says...

He is exaggerating!! I clearly am not acting like he said. First off I gave up a potential career to have and raise kids and that's my full time job. I don't get to make money because we thought it would be cheaper to have me stay home.

My friend is getting the same 4runner I want which irritates me because she is only getting it after I showed her what I was gonna want if I was getting a new car (this was after my car broke down but before we decided to get a new car instead of fix the old one). So I don't think she should be getting what I want if I can't have it myself.

I aslo brought up all the options for being better in the resale value if we ever get rid of it. 

He's mad about it but I look at it this way. I haven't worked in 10 years so that extra $13,000 is a little over $1,000 a year bonus I deserve for staying home to watch the kids. 

I don't think it's that much to ask.

Added by summergirl85 (female)

Side Updates

I guess I should also add girls lunches are when she likes to show off her newest things so rolling up in her new 4Runner is really what she wants to do. The problem with her argument of a $13k "bonus" is she goes to lunch at least twice a week at $25-$50 a pop (depending on how many mimosas she'll devour).

Of course that expense falls on me too. And I feel that's a decent bonus for her already.

Update by practicalfather (male)

I don't spend that much on lunch! I have spent that much but it's very infrequent and I haven't done it in a long time. It's about $20 (salad and 2 drinks max).

Update by summergirl85 (female)

In my world I include tips to the waiter in that cost! And you like to tip bigger than your friends. This is where the cash back comes in. So where I see $20 on the statement for lunch, it's really $27 after tip.

I checked yesterday's lunch bill in our account and it was $37 before tip I'm guessing. I took my leftovers lunch to work.

Update by practicalfather (male)

I paid for one of my friend's lunches. She left the tip for us if you must know. So it wasn't that much.

Update by summergirl85 (female)

So what you're basically saying is I paid for the both of you.

Update by practicalfather (male)
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