Is it fair for me to ask my boyfriend to stop drinking as much as he does?

First of all, my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 1/2 years and much of our relationship has been long-distance. We have had problems with his drinking throughout our relationship. When he was in college, he went out and got drunk every weekend. Now, he is in grad school and has cut back a lot, but my problem is that when he does drink, he goes overboard. I don't have a problem with him going out and having a good time with friends, I have a problem with him being hurtful to me, others, or himself. He has gotten in multiple physical fights with friends after drinking too much. Also, he gets mad if I ask him to limit his drinking and says he doesn't want me to control him. He doesn't understand how much his personality changes when he drinks. Now, on average, he drinks too much about once a month or so. I hardly ever drink, so it really makes me mad that alcohol seems to be so important to him. Another thing is that he says that he is 23 and he just wants to have fun and he has the rest of his life to be mature and responsible. I worry about our future together if he continues like this but he says the minute he lives with me and can be with me all the time, everything will change. But I don't believe he can change at the drop of a hat. I don't need to drink to have a good time, so I don't know why he does. I mean, I understand having a few drinks every once in awhile, but not getting drunk when it is obviously hurtful to people that love him...He doesn't want to be controlled, but that's not what I'm trying to do. He says that he loves me soooo much...so if that's the case, why doesn't he just give me what I want??
By NatalieS 15 years ago :: Dating
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