Husband taking sides with his "friend" over mine, what do you think? is this wrong?
So, I've been happliy married for 6 years now(together for 12) and 2 years ago a old friend from my husbands past came back into his life and is causing strife in our marriage. All this guy does (who is 34 and should be grown up) is talk shit about everyone he knows, how they raise their kids, what their jobs are and how they spend their money. He constantly complains about everything! Also critisizes about everything too, when I say everything, I mean everything! (Example: he came to visit this weekend, not even 2 minutes after walking in the door he saw a water bottle on our coffee table with a mio flavor bottle next to it, and assumed we needed a 5 minute lecture on how that "shit" is bad for you) Heres my delimma, my husband does not stick up for me or will not let me call him out when he's being an ass. I have a car for one that the friend had owned one like it years ago and had lots of issues (again not my problem) but he feels the need to critisize and demean my car everytime he sees it by making stupid comments like, "why dont you sell that piece of shit" "what a piece of shit" "oh lets take the car, oh right we'll be on the side of the road if we do haha". I think this is disrespectful, I love my car(it it doesnt leave me sitting like his did) and im not sitting here commenting on his automobiles faults. Another thing he does, is tell everyones business, everyone he knows he gossips about wether it be their relationship problems/financial problems..anything! I agree with the quote that "if they gossip to you, they will gossip about you".
One weekend we took a trip to St.Augustine,(us and him and his wife) and we didnt do much over there, went on a night cruise and managed to spend $600 in 48Hours ($200 was a crap B&B room) but did I make any remarks to him about what a waste that was? NO! I sucked it up, dealt with it and moved on. Now the same year, a few months later we invited them to go with us to our annual trip to Orlando to a theme park we enjoy visiting, once we got there, all he did was complain.. "what a waste of $75" "I couldve went to so-so with this kind of money" and the whole time he continues to just walk off without saying a word expecting us to come looking for him and if we arent right up his ass he gets this attitude with us (to which my husand does not speak up and gets mad if I do). This example is the sort of thing he does EVERYTIME we see him.. the other day we all went into Target, everytime they stopped and looked at something my husband and I would stand there and wait...but if we stopped to take a look at something they (more or less "he") would just walk off and take off across the store.. we continued to take a look in the furniture section for a minute while they wandered wherever for I'd say 5 minutes, then we decided to go look for them, here we are at the cash registers only to see them walking OUT the door, not even looking back or looking around for us. They get in there truck and call us asking "where are you?" (uhh dumbass, right where you left us, ever try looking?) so we walk out to their truck, I open the the door and catch her saying "HUSH giggle giggle" ..I mean seriously..this is some high school bullcrap.
This kind of thing is what happens EVERYTIME we see him. My husband calls him a friend because he's known him for 15 years, but during some of my husbands darker days including the first 8 years of our relationship this person was not there, a friend is someone who doesnt leave your side in my opinion. My husband tells me everytime he's being an ass to just ignore it and "get over it" and threatens me with divorce. He says since I dont work "he owns me and should do as he says". Note: my hubby never acted this way before the asshole came into our lives.
One weekend we took a trip to St.Augustine,(us and him and his wife) and we didnt do much over there, went on a night cruise and managed to spend $600 in 48Hours ($200 was a crap B&B room) but did I make any remarks to him about what a waste that was? NO! I sucked it up, dealt with it and moved on. Now the same year, a few months later we invited them to go with us to our annual trip to Orlando to a theme park we enjoy visiting, once we got there, all he did was complain.. "what a waste of $75" "I couldve went to so-so with this kind of money" and the whole time he continues to just walk off without saying a word expecting us to come looking for him and if we arent right up his ass he gets this attitude with us (to which my husand does not speak up and gets mad if I do). This example is the sort of thing he does EVERYTIME we see him.. the other day we all went into Target, everytime they stopped and looked at something my husband and I would stand there and wait...but if we stopped to take a look at something they (more or less "he") would just walk off and take off across the store.. we continued to take a look in the furniture section for a minute while they wandered wherever for I'd say 5 minutes, then we decided to go look for them, here we are at the cash registers only to see them walking OUT the door, not even looking back or looking around for us. They get in there truck and call us asking "where are you?" (uhh dumbass, right where you left us, ever try looking?) so we walk out to their truck, I open the the door and catch her saying "HUSH giggle giggle" ..I mean seriously..this is some high school bullcrap.
This kind of thing is what happens EVERYTIME we see him. My husband calls him a friend because he's known him for 15 years, but during some of my husbands darker days including the first 8 years of our relationship this person was not there, a friend is someone who doesnt leave your side in my opinion. My husband tells me everytime he's being an ass to just ignore it and "get over it" and threatens me with divorce. He says since I dont work "he owns me and should do as he says". Note: my hubby never acted this way before the asshole came into our lives.
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